HO HO HO!

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
May the love of JesusChrist overwhelm you all. And remember that the real reasson we celebrate Christmas is because in a day like this Jesus ( our savior) was born. So don't forget to give him a gift, and what better gift than to offer your heart for him to live in. For God so loved tha world that he gave his only begotten son; whosoever believeth in shall not perish but have everlasting life. John 3:16
And she gave birth to her first born son and wrapped him in swaddling cloth, and laidhim in a manger, because there was no place for them in the inn. Luke 2:7
" what better gift, than your heart?''
Jesus loves you!

STRONG LOVE...

LOVE, is a very deep word. Sometimes people don't realize how much weight this word has, how important it is to use it wisely! How much of an impact it has on people. This time I'll be talking about a different kind of LOVE and how it has changed my life. I refer to the LOVE I feel for my friends! There are 2 kinds of friends the intimate friends and the not so close friends. I consider myself blessed with some great friends. I want to talk about one specific friend I have, who has changed my perspective on what I call friend. His nickname is Spiderman, he is a great influence on me, he cares about me as much as I care about him, he has given me his trust, he worries about me and he isn't afraid to let me know when I am not doing what I am suppose to. I have come to respect him as an individual, trust him, look up to him and care about him. I know this must be a big responsibility for him to know, but I can help the way I have come to feel for him. I consider him much more than just a friend, I consider him to be more like a brother to me! I truly LOVE him, I always try to let him know I do! Everytime he feels sad I feel his pain, when he feels happy, joyfull it overcomes me! I know our bond is truer,stronger and certainly real! I LOVE you boy!

What is done is done!

hello!!!
It's me, sorry I haven't posted I've been very stressed lately, thanks for writting all of you! Anyways I did it, the party I was planning, it was great! Not that much at first but as time went by it started to get good! I want to give thanks to my friends for helping me and coming! Juan's birthday is today I haven't called but I will later on! He is now 18, he says its no big deal, but it is... It means another year of life, many other opportunities, God's grace letting you live healthy, with family and friends! It means another year in wich you will have to make important decisions, show everyone how much you have matured, it is another opportunity to do things right! Good luck with all of that. Oh and Happy Birthday!

Emotions!!!

What are emotions? What makes us react to things? What makes us love, hate,etc? How does one keep emotions healthy? How does one take care for emotions? Is having emotions essencial? Can we live without emotions? What do emotions do? Are emotions part of us or do we make them part of us? Can I choose not to have emotions? Based on the dictionary the word emotion means a strong feeling. I am an emotional person, everyone is or not? Any how I don't plan on talking about emotions rather I am going to talk about mix-emotions. I've been having lots of those lately... I am very happy my ex is staying over at my house this weekend, I hope he has a good time with my family and myself, but I don't want to do anything that will get our hopes up, because well we both know its not going to happen for now. Its hard for me to show him I care about him, and still deny I don't want to be with him. I am a complicated girl! The other thing I am feeling has nothing to do with my ex, in fact it has to do with another guy who I kind of like, he is very sweet towards me, but I don't want to get involved, cause of loyalty to my ex, even though he has told me I can do what ever I please, I just dont see it right! The things is I can't be with my ex and I don't think I should try to get to know that other guy either! So that is what I call mix- emotions! till next time!

Waiting 4 u 2 come back home!

I am still waiting for that day to come; when you come back home and everything goes back to normal. I know it is never going to be as it once was, but I just want to see you, feel your presence, be able to hugg you and feel your warmth. I miss you so much and there is nothing I could ever say that will hide how much I love you. This past weekend I have come to realize that many decision affect our lives, but I am so grateful you have continued to be the same with me. Everyday that goes by I fall harder for you. You are the person I have most loved nothing could ever top that. Even though we aren't together I feel we still are.

What does it mean?

Haven't you ever asked yourselves what things really mean?
I have! Right now something wierd is going on in my life, and all of my friends are trying to fix me up with this guy! Well, they are trying to fix me up with the guy I liked, but the thing is I am not interested in him anymore, just cuz! The whole dilema started when my friend told him I liked him. The next day he was sitting next to me in luch and we talked for a while. The next day I ignored him and he was always "THERE" werever I was there he was also. He even told me something stupid to start a conversation! I just dont wanna get my hopes up to find that he isn't interested! COMPLICATED ! I know!So what does he really mean? Oh well, to hell with it all... I rather wait for my real love to come to me!

Boys, Boys and more Boyz...

Isn't it strange how boys can be absolutely not interested in a girl but as soon as he knows that girl likes his, he changes his attitudes towards that girl?
Isn't it bizarre how guys are after you when you treat them the worst?
Isn't wierd that when you are feeling and looking crappy is whe guys are the most attracted to you?
Isn't odd, that you just want them to want you and they are not into you?
Isn't the boys mind strange, bizarre,wierd and odd?
The unusaul thing is we fall for them when they are acting like fools.
Isn't funny? Don't you just wanna kill them?
Thanks boys for complicating our existance! We wouldn't want you any other way!

Its December.

Its December! Only a few more days till Christmas! This is a season to be jolly , happy and staying positive! Hope is in our hearts! Love more than anything is what almost everyone wishes to have in such a festive holiday. Christmas makes people so giving and tremendously happy, thats why I love Christmas! Don't we all just love December! Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! My best wishes to you all!

The sound of your voice...

The sound of your voice through the telephone brought back so many memories. The good ones of course! Such great times the ones we lived those few months. Just staring at your eyes would unchain the things you felt inside. The sound of your voice so soft and mellow brought back the feelings I once felt for thee. It reminded me of the way you use to gently caress my skin and my whole body would just tremble with the contact of your smooth hands. The hours we use to spend looking at each other and listening to each others voices. All those unsteady feeling I would get inside of me just waiting for me to shout how much I trully love you. It also brought to my mind those 2nights; the one we both laid on my balcony and admire the sky, looking at those bright stars. The weather was so perfect too. But it also reminded me of that last night together, the one we spent hours talking to each other separated because of the gate. That night when I felt my whole life broke down into small pieces. That night when we said our goodbye's and didnt understand why. That night when you said that you wouldnt try convincing me. Oh that night when I really wanted you to say you wouldnt leave and that you wouldnt agree on loosing me. I wanted that inner part of you to take control, but we didnt, you didnt, rather, you cohibited yourself and let your pride hold you back from doing what you wanted. If I would have acted instead of renouncing to you. The sound of your voice brought freedom to my thoughts and memories. The sound of your voice brought back my love. The sound of your voice brought FREEDOM, LOVE & HOPE...

His name is Jesus...

I am in love! with some one who has never ever left me, and I have been so mean sometime but he is still there . He shows his mercy upon me and that is why I am so crazy about him! No one in this world can ever make me feel the way he does. With his love tenderness and forgiveness he has captivated me, I don't want absolutely anything else but his love for ever and ever he is my true love. His name is God! Jesus Christ our Lord! The best thing that has ever happend to mankind and me of course! God bless you all!

What to expect?!?!?

I don't know what to think anymore! I am tired of doing things the right way, right now I am feeling very sad, a very deep pain in my heart, I don't want to do anything 'bout it. I totally gave up! I am moving on, it hurts but I'll get through it... Or so I hope! With the help of my friends , family and anyone else who offers his or her help I will be ok once again. I know I am strong. I hadn't cried in a long while, I am so pathetic. I just have to have character and faith that someday I will get over him and nothing else will matter anymore. So deffinitely bye Juan, please if you read this don't call and please don't try contacting me anymore, in any way... I just don't want to know 'bout you for the moment.

SHOCKED!

There are so many things that there just not the same anymore...

Isn't it hard enough?

The human being is always in a constant change. We change the way we dress, look, act, the music we hear, the way we think, and the things we believe. No matter how much the world changes (and I do mean us as well) we humans still don't get use to some types of changes. For example death, we all know we are going to die someday, but when that day come (to a family member, friend ,etc.) it is hard for us to adjust. I think that when it come to love we are basically the same way. For example I'll be using myself, I love many people ( my parents,friends,etc.), but when it comes for me to have a partner(boyfriend), when things suddenly change, their effects seem to affect me the most. I know you are all tired'cuz of da same.am just so amazed in the way I have reacted to these changes in my life. It's hard to admit but I haven't gotten over my last relationship. I had actually developed a strong sense of love and even though we are not together I still feel like he is a great part of my life. Now my love for him has changed or it has evolved. Not in a bad way, but now it is just not the same, even though I still care about him I feel so much different now. This change has made me appreciate him so much more that what I use to, but now it is just too late, and I am not expecting to go back together, but this has tought me such a very valuable lesson. I didn't take him for granted, but now becuz of him physical and spiritual absence of him in my life I feel such a deep need for him. I know I ended up making no sense but what to say I quite don't make any sense at all.

Confused?

HI,
I am super confused! This is a hard decision to make, not that there is anyone asking me to decide anything, but I feel I have to. Anyhow I know that no one sees this blog so I actually feel like I can be honest with myself and think stuff throughly. Well back to the decision I have to make, I love someone, that someone is my ex (Juan), nothing out of the blue, but there is nothing I can do. I wish I could be with him once again but it is obvious we are not going back, not because either of us did something very bad, just because we live many miles away from each other. Even though he might not accept it, he was a great boyfriend! Back to the problem, I am not ready to move on but I know I should 'cause if there is no posible way of us two ever getting back together, the correct thing to do is to stop obsesing over him and try to mantain a normal life without him. That sounds so mean and evil, 'cause I know he loves me to. The decision I should probably take is the most obvious one! But its so hard when you really love a person to let go as if nothing ever happend. I know there are many people ahead and that he isn't the only man on this world. So... what to do when you really love someone! As that famous saying, says " when you love something you should set it free if it comes back it means it was yours but if it doesnt it means it never was". I think that is what I have to do, I know he wont understand me, and that he might get mad and chose never to talk to me, but I know in my heart this is the right way to go! see you on the finish line, I hope...

Thanksgiving is on the way!!!

Hey you all,
Tomorrow is thanksgiving and I have so much to give thanks for. Here are a few;
for my health, for my family,for my wounderful friends that never leave me, for my life, for my studies, for the love of my life, for everything I have, own, etc. I love this time of the year, its eating turkey almost the whole month! lol! OOH I almost forgot, I am thankful because my aunt gave birth yesterday and she is ok and the the baby is ok as well. Don't you just love giving thanks? we should do it everyday! Well guys have a very Happy Thanksgiving! Love you all!!!

Not again!

Hello...
Today was such a dull day!!!
Today we celebrated, what we call the turkey race! It was lame, but at least I got to see the guy I kind of like run!!! Anyways, the day got better as it went by, my homeroom teacher prepared a delicious lunch for all of us and soon my classmates and I started to play some games and others danced the lunch period away. At least it had some fun involved!lol. My friends thought it would be fun to torture me by telling the guy I like that I am interested in him, well the funny for them but not for me part of the story, is they called him so I could talk to him and I completely made a fool of myself I tripped and fell flat on my face!! Humiliating, I know! So now I have less probabilities to actually getting to know him. In the other hand, I am glad, cause I ain't over my ex-boyfriend yet! till next time...

HI

Today was a very interesting day...
My dad and I went for a drive and later on we stopped for some food! I drove all the way back to my house. I was so excited, cause my dad is teaching me how to drive! Anyways, yesterday was a very hectic day for me! Cause my friends and I are planning a Christmas party at my house! Yesterday my friends and I went shopping for the decoration, it was fun but at the same time very exhausting! Thats all for know, I'll tell you guys how the party turned out and I'll add some pictures as well.